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Writer's pictureDiana Stelin

Using both hands?


What happens to us along the way? We're so afraid to leave our masks, we always play by the book, follow the rules of engagement at all costs.


I watch kids create, their openness and sheer excitement at communicating with the paint, that visceral need to touch it, to manipulate it, to see what happens if. What if I add a bit of yellow to white and black? Woah, is that gold I just got? And what if I put a bit of white to that mixture of blue and green? Is that a type of turquoise? What is there was red in it?


And then I watch adults and how difficult it is for them to break free, to work within new limitations, to still feel like they can be little children. Hell, it's tricky for me to accept all of me.


I'm ambidextrous. It's a learned skill due to the strict structure of a Russian upbringing. I paint with my left hand as that is the one carefree part of me that they left alone. It's like an element of me that isn't bound by societal norms, a skill that allows me to dance ecstatically when I paint, to be expressive and wild, and raw. But my right hand just sort of hangs by the side. Well, I decided that this is it. That I'll no longer settle for following the norms, that I'll let the world see all of me. And I made my right hand my melting hand. I gave it a steady assignment that it's capable of doing. I trusted it to be semi-controlling. Together with my left hand they are now a team. My left hand mixed the most exquisite combinations. My right hand - abstracts the process. It's groundbreaking, it's so freeing.


What is all of us accepted all parts of us? Let the world see all the different sides of our interests? What if your corporate employer saw what a beautiful dancer you are, what a balanced yogi you can be? A strong boxer? Wouldn't the world be just a tad more grounding, a bit more exciting and inspiring?



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